“Our self-images define our own boundaries, limiting us to the narrow ideas of who we believe ourselves to be.” ~Ezra Bayda~ 

If you’ve ever spent time with someone who criticized your every move, always found fault with your choices or nit-picked the decisions you’ve made, you’d likely consider that person to be toxic, and would probably limit your interactions.

Yet, the unkindness perpetrated by others often pales in comparison to the dialogue of our inner critic. Many people place impossible demands upon themselves and carry the mental weight of perceived mistakes, lost opportunities, guilt or shame.

Should you observe negative self-talk, stop and change the momentum of your thoughts. Affirmations, gratitude and self-love can shift the energy into a more productive direction. Instead of demanding that you be perfect, seek to transform your experience through conscious acceptance. Don’t hate your way to change. Let love open you to the transformative energy that is all around you.

Ultimately, since the world is our reflection, we can actively practice kindness on every level: physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. As your self-love increases, you’ll notice that you complain less. Acceptance, compassion, balance and harmony are the by-products of of a person who is at ease in the present moment.

You can learn a lot about a person by listening to what they don’t say about themselves.

“We set goals that we think will guide us through the course of life. But we forget that our goals are not so much conscious choices as they are aggregates of our innate disposition, our particular conditioning, and ever-changing life circumstances. To think that we can will our destiny is a false prop, the vanity of needing to see ourselves as the agent of change.” ~Ezra Bayda~ 

We have an inner purpose and an outer purpose. Our inner purpose is to awaken. The outer purpose facilitates how we will awaken and will likely change as you move through the journey of your transformation.   

Higher consciousness calls upon us to experience life without attachment to outcomes; therefore, it is normal for the awakening student to go through a period of feeling disconnected from what drives the world around us. Releasing ego means that we no longer seek outside validation of our value. We may drop out of the endless pursuit of “making it” and instead seek only the grace of transformation. 

This doesn’t mean that we have no goals or preferences. It means only that we are not defined by them, nor are we striving for some idealistic, ego-driven future moment. Our actions become infused with spirit in such as way that we are able to transform the world around us simply by being authentic, joyful expressions of the Divine.   

When we are mindful, a new quality comes into our experiences. Rather than being a means to an end, the present moment becomes a doorway into the Infinite. In A New Earth, Eckhart Tolle writes, “Not what you do, but how you do what you do determines whether you are fulfilling your destiny. And how you do what you do is determined by your state of consciousness.”

See yourself as a lifetime student of love. There is much yet to discover.

“Wisdom is knowing I am nothing,
Love is knowing I am everything,
and between the two my life moves.” ~Nisargadatta Maharaj~ 

We are on an incredible journey. No matter how many lifetimes you’ve had so far, no matter how high your state of consciousness, remember that earth is simply the beginning. This playground allows us to explore the concepts of separation, contrast and opposites in order to discover the higher truths of balance, compassion and Oneness.  

When we have named every star in the sky, counted the grains on every beach, loved through a thousand lifetimes and experienced this world in every possible way, the adventure will then take us to new levels of existence.   

Life can sometimes be overwhelming, though. Our physical senses create a sense of solidity out of illusion, and often we can feel trapped by tunnel vision. The purpose of meditation or conscious breathing is to briefly allow you to connect with the infinite aspect of who you are. As we learn to see beyond appearances, we can touch eternity. You are far more than the role you are currently playing in this lifetime.  

All that we experience is a projection of our inner state of consciousness.

“Love is the bridge between you and everything.” ~Rumi~   

Whenever I see someone caught up in anger, judging, blaming, attacking or spewing hatred in it’s various forms, all I feel is compassion. Imagine going through life carrying the weight of all that self-hatred. Imagine being so afraid to take personal responsibility that the world appears to be a dangerous place filled with evil people.

This type of behavior indicates that the ego-mind has repeated negativity often enough to trigger what Eckhart Tolle refers to as “the pain body.” Once the pain body is in control, it seeks to steal energy from others by getting a reaction.

As you clear the layers of negativity from your own experience, you’ll notice that you react less to others who are in the grip of unconsciousness. This healthy neutrality provides greater objectivity and awareness when dealing with those who are temporarily insane

When someone in your life leaves you feeling tired, head-achy or drained, observe your own reactivity. Even if your actions are measured, chances are that your thoughts are still allowing psychic vampirism to occur. Do your best to move into compassion. See the other as someone who is currently unaware of their own potential and beauty and become a reflection of their sacredness. There is no greater gift than helping another to find their way out of fear.

When faced with an uncomfortable situation, seek the gifts that it has to offer.

“Spiritual work is possible in one place alone: here, in exactly what you are experiencing right now.” ~Ezra Bayda~ 

The quickest way to transform any challenge is to recognize it’s purpose in your life. Movement from victim-hood to empowerment comes through the understanding that every circumstance plays a specific role in your spiritual development. Things that seem negative or feel like blockages offer the greatest opportunities for breakthrough.  

When you clear a limiting belief, heal an old wound or cultivate a new aspect of your strengths, the “problem” will either leave your life because it is no longer needed, or you will become neutral about it. The key is to recognize the opportunity, utilize it, move into gratitude and release it. 

Life will often present the same type of situation in various forms when we are working on a particular issue. If we miss the lesson, it will manifest again with a little more intensity each time until we cannot help but become aware of it. You do not need trauma in order to grow. Awareness can help you handle things while they are still small and manageable

You are more powerful than you realize. You are a unique expression of the Divine. The joy is in the discovery.

Celebration acknowledges the many gifts you have been given.

“Celebration is a thankfulness; it is prayer that comes out of gratitude. It is the recognition of the gift that has been given to us… it is understanding. It is overflowing love for the existence that has done so much for us.” ~Osho~

There is no need to wait for a reason to be joyful. Honor this moment through laughter and playfulness and bring a gentle awareness to the perfection of your life. The ego-mind creates a heaviness that distracts us from enjoying the present moment. It may tell you that things are not good enough, that you are not yet good enough or that there’s too much to be done… there’s no time to be silly or frivolous. Consider that the ego’s job is to teach through the contrast; therefore, choosing to purposely explore the opposite of it’s serious inclination is a good use of your energy. 

Those who know how to celebrate life also know the joys of working hard, and loving deeply. They bring an empowered, meditative quality to the present moment rather than being lost in thought. See if you can recognize the sacredness in the ordinary. All that you need is already within you and all of existence responds to the wonder of your light.

Trust the process of awakening.

“The path to love requires open-hearted attention to the very things that seem to block our way to it.” ~Ezra Bayda~   

Sometimes it takes years (or lifetimes!) before we fully understand a particular aspect of our spiritual growth. We go through repetitive circumstances and often explore various aspects of the same lesson before we see it clearly and can finally move on, no longer needing that particular pattern in order to do our work. Thankfully, once enlightenment occurs, we feel liberated and it quickly becomes a fading piece of our history.

It can be difficult to see clearly when engaged with life’s challenges because intense emotions can be overwhelming. Keep this in mind when interacting with those who are caught in repetitive patterns of their own. The ego-mind is always resistant to insight; however, we know that awakening will eventually occur. Your actions can easily plant seeds that will eventually play a role in someone’s transformation. 

Trust that life will unfold in the perfect way at the perfect time. We all seek the same Oneness; however, each path is unique and each of us must do our own work.

Acceptance is an act of love.

“The spiritual practice of relationships is about working on ourselves only, freeing ourselves from the constricting grip of our own unhappiness. It is not the other person’s job to take our unhappiness away; our discomfort is our own responsibility. Attending to our spiritual tasks – seeing our judgments, opinions, beliefs, demands, and staying present with the fears out of which they all arise – frees others to move toward us. Then, when they no longer feel the need to defend, they become more willing to take care of their job. Thus joy in relationships becomes possible.” ~Ezra Bayda~ 

Every relationship in your life, no matter how fleeting, provides an opportunity to practice loving, healthy interactions. The more proficient you become, the more peace you experience in your day-to-day life. When others become lost in the grip of ego, your balance and equanimity can transform even the most challenging of situations into spacial awareness. 

How would your experiences change if you were not subject to disappointment? What would it take to simply allow those who grace your life to grow at their own pace while offering acceptance, love and support for their journey? These states of higher consciousness are more easily accessed when you are free of expectation. 

Encircle the world with your love. Small, consistent kindnesses can spark the light of consciousness to awaken. Everyone and everything is our teacher.

When you are able to celebrate all life as sacred, there is nothing to fear.

“The great miracle of Zen is in the transformation of the mundane into the sacred.. and the miracle of Zen is neither interested in the past nor in the future. Its total interest is in the present. Maybe that’s why the miracle is possible, because the past and the future are bridged by the present.” ~Osho~ 

As we place our focus on the present moment, we discover that we are entirely capable of handling whatever arises. Courage is discovered and expressed in the Now. The mind creates future-based fear through the pondering of the unknown – what will the future hold? How will I survive when I am old? What if…? Realize that all thought forms are insubstantial. Quiet the mind and experience the fullness of this moment. Then act.

When you recognize the sacredness in all things, it brings a different quality into your experience. Operating from a detached sense of unconditional love also brings courageous to the surface. Detachment allows us to give without demands. It is a purity that expresses itself through us. What would your expression of life be if you were fearless? Be that. Do that. Live that.

This is the moment of transformation. How will you use it?

Every action has an equal and opposite reaction.

“Lord make me an instrument of your peace
Where there is hatred let me sow love
Where there is injury, pardon
Where there is doubt, faith
Where there is despair, hope
Where there is darkness, light
And where there is sadness, joy O divine master grant that I may
not so much seek to be consoled as to console
to be understood as to understand
To be loved as to love
For it is in giving that we receive
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned
And it’s in dying that we are born to eternal life.” ~St. Frances of Assisi~ 

When you witness hatred, know that it’s opposite is absolutely possible. As a conscious soul in the process of awakening, you have the opportunity to play the role of love in that type of equation. The trick is to recognize the dysfunction while choosing to remain in balance and non-reactive.    

It takes practice to maintain a sense of calm in the face of intense negativity; however, that is the purpose of the spiritual seeker. After all, anyone can be zen while meditating on a mountaintop. We are called upon to bring a higher energy to challenging situations.    

While you already have the tools you need to face these circumstances with grace, your challenges provide an opportunity to hone these skills and witness them in action. It takes the ideas and concepts you are learning and allows you to put them into practical motion.  

We are light-bringers in a world that often seems filled with darkness. Your purpose is to awaken, to teach and to serve.